Strange Dreams of the Now and the Not Yet

the storm has passed
i am spent
another night of dreams
full of regret
i awake so exhausted
i wonder if i have slept
i can’t make sense of the world within
there is such a disconnect
what i do while awake is never enough
i’m still working on the same project
with no finish line in sight
caught in the now and not yet

i keep putting words to paper
but cannot seem to forget the lives unlived
troubled by the unknown and a solitary mindset
still seeking that place where i can finally rest
free from dreams that mock my choices
and the faith i confess

all i do and have done is never enough
why am still so full of so many regrets
lives i could have lived with lovers i have met
still trying to make sense of what i will never understand
caught in this web of the now and not yet

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